Living in the past is their only option.
Memories of far off distant events, people and places become their reality, their here and now.
Often these events can be recalled with clarity and detail.
Memories of recent activities, such as where they went last week or who they saw yesterday just do not exist for them, or form part of a disjointed recollection.
However, when the initial diagnosis of dementia is made people often fear that they will lose their distant memories and therefore the person that they are.
Reassurance needs to be given to them and the opportunity for family to help the person to enjoy what memories they have.
Putting together a memory box can also be helpful at this time.
There will come a time as the dementia becomes very advanced, when even these memories will fade.
The Role of the Family For family and carers to help someone to enjoy life, means living with them in their own unique past.
Recalling events with them of happy family days or exciting national occasions can bring much pleasure to someone whose grasp on what they did last week is rather tenuous.
Sitting and looking through family albums can initiate conversations and help to recall happiness from the past.
When the person no longer recognises once familiar faces the emotional memories can still bring pleasure to them.
They may not know who the person is, their relationship to them or their name, but they will still have reinforced emotional memories of these people, so that their response to the photograph can bring feelings of security and wellbeing associated with that person.
It is also possible that they may experience distress.
It is also possible that they get the generations mixed up, seeing a photograph of their brother and believing it to be their father as they remember him from their own childhood.
They may also, for example, mistake their visiting thirty-year old daughter for their own sister as she was at that age and greet her by the sister's name.
A familial similarity makes this even more likely.
This needs to be accepted by family and carers and the physical changes in the brain which cause this, need to be understood.
Once this is understood changes in behaviour, mood and intellectual capacity are easier to grasp.
Family carers need skills and patience in not becoming irritated by a person's confusion over dates, times and events.
It is probably better not to contradict as this can cause distress and means that the person is less likely to engage in a conversation for fear of looking silly or being corrected all the time.
The Role of the Professional Carer It is also accepted that professional carers need to have an in depth knowledge of a person's family/social history so that they can take part in that person's reality.
They can understand why the person responds to certain things in the way that they do, whether this results in a positive or negative reaction.
Someone who frequently asks what the time is may have had a job that required accurate time keeping, like a bus driver.
So having this understanding can make the job of the carer more satisfying and result in a person who is more at ease.