The feeling of loneliness can really make a person die inside.
It's like a disease that creates a hole in the heart.
As you continue to feel lonely, the hole gets deeper and bigger until you get to the point when you feel dead inside: a characteristic of the negative person.
For a negative person, life is so much harder and the world is a lot heavier, and finding friends who will help treat the loneliness is a really big thing.
So how do you cure the hole in your heart? How does the negative person find friends? Quality Over Quantity Sure, it is a good thing if you can say that you have a lot of friends.
But whether you admit it or not, there are "friends" who you are really not sure about.
There are friends who only say they are your friends when they need something from you but disappear when you need them.
There are also friends who are only your friends as long as you meet a certain criteria and pretend to be someone that you are not.
It's a fact of life.
Humans can be predators and opportunists.
These types of "friends" would actually make you feel more alone instead of lifting you up.
Let me just make it clear that I am not against having a lot of friends.
What I am saying is that if you have to transform into a totally different person just to be accepted as a friend, then it's not worth it.
If you have to give to the point of losing a lot just to be considered a friend, then it is not worth it.
Of course, you still have to do just a little adjustment to your personality and you also have to give something to real friends, but the difference is that with real friends, you feel that you are accepted for what you are, and you don't have to hurt yourself just to be accepted.
Meeting People Gaining friends is also a trial-and-error process where you meet someone in some way, hangout with them, and see if you can really stick together.
I said meeting someone in some way because there are many ways to meet people.
You can just approach someone and introduce yourself if you have enough confidence.
You can also get introduced by a mutual friend.
Or, you might just experience some random situation where you meet someone and create a connection that very instant.
The world is such an interesting place if you would just learn to dive into it more.
I also make some friends over the internet with social networking, and also at a site called help.
com.
I know it may not sound like a good idea to be detached from the real world, but it's a good place to start.
You will see that you are not the only one who thinks and feels the way you do.
In my opinion, the internet can be a place where you can freely express yourself.
Like me making this blog.
I could never find anyone around here in the real world who would want to listen to everything I say in every article here in one sitting..
Be Yourself Usually, the first set of friends we have are people we met since childhood when life wasn't as complicated as it has become now that you've grown up.
Friendship was a natural thing that happened somewhere along the way that you can't even determine when and how you started to be friends.
If you will look closer, you will see that it was a time when you didn't really have to put a mask on.
You were just you, wanting to have someone to play with.
You had something in common which was the need to have someone to play with and it just happened.
But, as you grew up and life started to become more complex than just going out to play, eat when you're hungry and sleep when you're sleepy.
Life and people become more complex as time goes by and we grow older.
But, like I said above, you don't have to hurt yourself and sink more just to find friends.
Just be yourself to attract people who are just like you, or if not like you at least people who would accept you for who you really are.
Pretending to be something else can really tire you out in the long run, especially pretending to be nice.
It might be good only as long as you keep it up.
But the problem is if you slip up.
One mistake that will expose the real you could mean losing the trust of the friends you have gained by your false pretense.
Nobody really likes a hypocrite.
Nobody wants to hangout with someone they know they can't trust.
It's so much better to have them dislike you initially for being you, and then slowly learn to accept and deal with you as time goes by.
As one good friend of mine told me once, "when you get through the bad, the good is great".
He had a very mean personality to be honest.
He does not try to be tactful and just says what he feels no matter how hurtful it would be.
That, plus he's a huge, mean-looking guy and you'll see why he scared me at first.
But, as I got to hang out with him(because I had to, he was roommate), I discovered that he also had a negative side to him, and his meanness was his defense mechanism to avoid getting hurt.
He is now what I consider one of the best friends I ever had.
Be Trustworthy Trust may be the most important element in all the aspects of friendship.
People make friends with you because they feel that they can trust you.
Your friends are still your friends because they know they can trust you.
Even you yourself have placed a certain degree of trust to each of your friends.
You share with them things that you wouldn't share to a random stranger.
People should know what to expect from you so don't be too unpredictable.
Like I said earlier, just be yourself.
Don't go all the way just to impress people.
Just show them that you can be trusted and that they can rely on you, just as much as you can trust and rely on them.
That is how friendship works because friendship is all about mutual trust and relying on each other for support.